I’m not successful and I know why! And you’re not successful either, so let’s talk about it. I’ve been a blogger for NINE years, NINE! You’d think, within two years, I should be riding high on that sweet delicious blog money! I should have all the high-dollar collabs, photos popping, getting sent out to amazing destinations, and not giving the sad face to my skeptical bank account. But, in my new quest to get ONE MILLION FOLLOWERS I realized my behaviors have definitely stopped me from being farther in the game than I should be. And, because I want to help you do better in your endeavors, I thought I’d bring you along for the ride. Here’s the FIVE reasons why I’m not successful:
JEALOUS – I get jealous way more than I’d like to admit. I know! And at my age! But in the time of online ‘storytelling’, it’s hard not to lust after the uber-pretty girl with the supposedly amazing relationship, banging body, awesome shoe collection, and successful ‘squad’. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way but, I always have to remind myself that she’s just showing the highlight reel. Jealousy and envy can be the cause of depression and anxiety. These factors can make one feel stuck, progress limited. There’s no way you or I can be successful living in that warped thought process. I’m committed to letting go of petty jealousy and admitting that she probably works a bit harder than me in order these amazing highlights. Which leads me to point #2 . . .
LAZY – How many times have you come up with a great idea, only to let it fall to the wayside? Then, you get mad when you see someone else do it? Listen, I’m the best at coming up with ideas. I come up with at least two new ideas a day: Ideas for blog posts, photos shoots, books, clothes, collaborations, and what ever else. STOP IT! Let’s agree to stop being so lazy! Let’s agree to write these ideas down. Get a notebook that you carry in your bag. Write the vision, commit to working on the details for a week or so, then decide if it’s worth moving forward. The best ideas only come to life through HARD WORK and dedication. Stop dropping the dream at the doorstep when the details become overwhelming. WORK!
FAKE – On the flip-side of my jealousy issue, I have an issue with being the real me. I don’t want people to be jealous so I can tend to water down my personality, successes, and progress. Someone compliments me on a campaign, I try to downplay it. Someone tells me I look good today, instead of thanking them, I rush to return the favor. It’s OK to be YOU! It’s okay to admit your greatness. If you’ve overcome a challenge, be proud of where you’re at. Someone compliments you, thank them. There was a time I’d NEVER wear a swimsuit in public, now, I promote a entire body positivity campaign! That’s GROWTH! Don’t water yourself down because someone can’t handle you at 100 proof!
IMPATIENT – Oh, this is a real one right here! Think you supposed to be the most popping thing in the department, but you too impatient to get your accolades. I’m telling you it’s a dizzying cycle. Understand, the longer the wait, the bigger the gift. If you rush, you’ll have a horrible presentation and a short-lived success. I’ve had my share of impatient times. What does that impatience lead me to, the jealousy train! Just because the world isn’t giving you roses as soon as you wake up, doesn’t mean that your hard work isn’t being noticed. Trust, your time (and my time) is coming!
SCARED – Of all the reasons listed above, FEAR is the basis for each one. The reason why I’m not as successful as I should be (and maybe you too) is because I’m scared of my own greatness. My own power to be an change agent in this day has me scared senseless, allowing me to seek the distractions of laziness, jealousy, being fake, and feigning impatience. The fear of taking this ‘lil ol blog’ to higher heights involves WORK, stepping out of my comfort zone, being rejected, and being judged. In no way, should those fears stop me or you from becoming our BEST SELVES. Living in a constant state of fear is toxic. Yet, so many people exist in that space. God didn’t create you to live like that.
God gives us gifts to help our world. Your platform isn’t BEYONCE big, but it’s big enough to encourage your neighbor to do something awesome too. Don’t blow out your candle before anyone sees the light and don’t sabotage yourself because your scared of success.