What to Wear: Thongs, Briefs, or Boy Shorts

Let’s talk about underwear! Y’all, I’m mad at people wear the WRONG UNDERWEAR at the WRONG TIME! I’m mad at people wearing too small panties, too big panties, and just sad panties. Also, did you KNOW that you are supposed to get new underwear EVERY SIX MONTHS! Yes, girl! Like, throw the daily panties away and start fresh! So let’s talk about the right time, to wear the right panties.

Around the time when Sisqo sung the THE THONG SONG, thong sales just went through the roof. Victoria’s Secret saw such an increase in thong sales, the retailer was brought back to life! Ladies everywhere (all shapes and sizes) decided that they too must be about the business of a thong. I’m not saying you shouldn’t wear a thong I’m saying, you need . Thongs shouldn’t be your ONLY style of underwear you choose, here’s several reasons why:


types of panties

Let’s start with underwear basics: You have your brief, hipster, high-cut brief, bikini, thong, and boy shorts. The illustration above is a perfect example of the typical underwear sold by retailers. Everyone has their preference. The general rule: No matter what material your panties are made with ALWAYS choose a cotton crotch lining! Cotton pulls moisture from the body, is more hygienic for your lady parts, and easy to clean. I suggest all cotton panties, but I do have a couple special occasion silky numbers that feel real good on the skin.

The other rule to live by: Buy new underwear every six months, throw the daily panties away. Like I said, I have special occasion underwear that I don’t wear as much as my Monday thru Friday gang. After awhile, most underwear aren’t getting 100% clean in the wash. Throw away your dailies, and buy new underwear every six months. Subscription boxes like PANTY DROP are a great way to update your rotation. They go up to a size 6x and have some amazing brands.

So, you wearing the right panties?

Underwear with Sundresses: It’s sundress season and the people are out here! NO THONGS under SUNDRESSES! Why, you ask? When you put on a thong, it naturally separates your butt cheeks (lets be real) depending on your body structure. Now, you got butt cheeks flapping in the wind under a sundress. When you are not walking, you have a sundress WEDGE!

Wear boy shorts or briefs with sundresses. If the wind blows, you are covered. It’s much more healthier in the summer, especially in Tennessee, with all this heat we suffer. Especially the moisture wicking kind, so good for keeping you lady parts healthy.  I’m just saying, give them a try.

Thongs with jeans are always skeptical

Underwear for Jeans: I don’t get it. Jeans are made of the roughest material known to man. You can wear a thong if you like. But make sure your thong is the right size, not too big and doesn’t’ show your whole situation when you bend over. Personally and professionally, I suggest cotton briefs or hipster panties with jeans. All cotton panties don’t have to be grandma style. They have really cute ones now days. Just find your correct size.

Underwear with formal gowns: Depending on the cut and fit of your gown this is the time to look at underwear that won’t create lines. Now, it’s thong time. But you can also wear a micro-fiber/seamless hipster style too. Or you can wear a pair of Spanx.

Underwear for working out:  Ladies, I know you do not want panty-line in your work out shorts, but when I am in yoga class, behind you, and we are stretching, I don’t want to see your thong print.  Most doctors don’t recommend for women to wear thongs during working out for fear of rectal bacteria traveling to your lady part. That bacteria can give you a supreme infection (source). Boy shorts, are a good deal. Even low-cut bikini style or a breathable cotton brief, is good for wearing at the gym.

Underwear when you have a FUPA:  This is not about how big you are, but about you’re proportioned. I see alot of my plus-size ladies wearing TOO SMALL PANTIES! Oh, it burns my biscuits! If your stomach is hanging over your panties, in any way, YOU need to face the truth, and get some bigger panties. It’s real out here. People are laughing, pointing, and posting your pic on the Internet, and I’m mad for you. I don’t want that for you. Let it go. Go a size up and thank me later. Proper fitting panties give you a smoother silhouette, especially if you aren’t the type to wear spanx or body shapers.

The point is, there are so many styles of underwear to choose from. Why get stuck with too small panties, wearing thongs all the time, and being generally unhealthy in the vagina area?

Did you learn some new panty info today? What’s your panty preference? Let’s discuss in the comments section!

This post was edited from 2008 and now contains affiliate links

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